When Not-GF becomes TMI 😬

Hey Siri, how do you say "I'm currently being held hostage by my toilet bowl?" in corporate?

There are no shortage of unfortunate side effects from the pandemic, but one of them has got to be follow-up questions after a sick day. With the looming threat of COVID, everyone wants to know exactly what illness you had and make sure they don't get it. Sadly, sometimes, the truth is simply NSFW... particularly when you have Celiac Disease.

Backing up a little bit, what is Celiac Disease? For anyone who doesn't know, Celiac Disease is an autoimmune disorder which creates reactions to gluten, wheat, barley, and rye. Over time, the immune reactions cause damage to the small intestine and other (potentially severe) medical complications.

The next logical question is, "what the heck is gluten?" Yes, it's real, and no, not only the Kardashians avoid it. Since 'gluten' blew up in the cultural zeitgeist, the world has been flooded with 'gluten-sensitive' options and people's opinions on gluten. But what actually is it? It's a protein found in wheat. When thinking about items that typically are not gluten-free, think of breads, cakes, pastries, cereals, pastas, pizzas, etc. Moreover, any item that has been cooked on or near anything with gluten will not be Celiac-safe. Ingesting such items is called cross-contamination and can make people with Celiac Disease very sick.

Sounds daunting? It can be. I've had Celiac for over 20 years and it can still be difficult to navigate. On one hand, having more options is a blessing. Seven-year-old me could never have imagined some of the bread and pizza available to me now. However, with progress also came complications. Now that the gluten-free (safe) food has gotten better and more like the original, it's gotten that much harder to tell them apart. And that doesn't even cover the issue of cross-contamination at restaurants, parties, friend's homes, and even accidental packaging or processing errors.

Since I've had Harlow, I have yet to be "glutened." Knock on wood. However, I have had the awkward conundrum of calling out sick for it many times. I never know how to field in-person, follow-up questions... or how much detail to give in my OOO email? Carrie Bradshaw did not prepare me for this!

I usually go with the simple: "I ate something with gluten and I cannot work today." Honestly, I don't love this answer. I feel like it doesn't express the gravity of how incapacitated I am... but the truth is just too real. Additionally, sometimes this short explanation leaves people wanting more detail. None of which are pretty. Some things are better left to the imagination!

For anyone that finds themselves doubled over, cursing the "too good to be true" fried chicken, or gluten-free pasta boiled in contaminated water (not my favorite trip to New York), I usually take Emetrol. It is a liquid medicine available over the counter and helps quell my stomach symptoms. Additionally, I find a comfy space in a dark room, Advil, and a change of clothes (if you tend to sweat or break out in hives.) Tips and tricks for navigating accidental ingestion is probably a whole other post, but it really depends on the situation. Celiac can be a roulette wheel of symptoms and the damage from just one exposure can last for days, sometimes weeks. But the main thing is to drink lots of water. Flush it out of your system and stay hydrated. Once the actual "hit" passes, you might want to get some yogurt or probiotics, as the villi (lining in your stomach) will be inflamed. It may take time for digesting food to not feel terrible.

I should take this opportunity to say, this is not medical advice and you should always consult a doctor. Additionally, every Celiac reacts differently. Some don't have any symptoms at all. But staying the course on a gluten-free diet is the best way to avoid damage and stay healthy.

As far as work is concerned, if all else fails, you can always just send them this photo. Pretty much sums up the vibe.

Always,

Brooke & Harlow